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Agony In Flesh

by September Murder

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1.
I can’t go to bed,The sea calls me. It’s flawless, clear and impressing. My damnation is drawn in the sand, Let’s take a walk, the moon – a disgrace, my face is drenched, my will leads me. After all, it’s a feeling of safety. I sail away, with my cold angel, We were here before. The waves swallow the shore, I hide my knowledge in water. No letters to receive, no salvation. The clouds fight the soil without any regrets I’m falling deep. My strange conception, seals my annihilation. Banned in a cell my face turns white, the pain eats me alive, I surrender. Barely, faded, contanimative, the so called air. The moon enlights my closed eyes, can’t keep shining, they’re dying. I Still breath, can’t leave, I’m locked up, in the patron of life. Control doesn’t surround me here, ghosts and transgressors, they want me, they fight with my forgotten guilt in life, they make me will-less to burn endless in their cold blood.
2.
Depressed life sorrounded by walls Ten are white one is red It disappears within hours It’s full of color but so damn bleached I look through it like glas the invincible gift The clouds are talking while spitting on me The window only got clearer My raped body twitches all the time My thin voice is talking I’m scared of myself and all that is here The blister crushes exploding fear Human hands are touching me I can’t run away Ten fingers, a master that conquers All of me all to breath all I can receive You ask me why I’m scared you don’t wanna know If You want to hear the story let’s begin the show It all started a long time ago I Can’t remember everything but I remember you On a long way back home I looked up The sky was dark and sad in it’s heart The place was empty the moon was my light Searching for a save place in heaven I turned around I saw a cruel shadow Running, no stopping was a clear aim in you I’m scared of myself and all that is here The blister crushes exploding fear Human hands are touching me I can’t run away Ten fingers a master that conquers All of me all to breath all I can receive You ask me why I’m scared you don’t wanna know If you want to hear the story let’s begin the show I lost my life who gives it back I won’t find an answer but find revenge Dreams and perspectives every child has You took from me where I can rest Cold Fear Blind Tears Suffer, Pain Cries In Vain I saw the dawn Do you think of the day you’ll walk alone Do you think of your triumph I know your face I know your race I had no reason to worry about But society had another gift for me You walked away without any barrage My one last hope I offer to you I’m sure hell will give you the pleasure Burn for me forever tonight But who knows if it will happen
3.
Someone told me the fog of war is over In my dreams in life or in your soul Take it as a fact, to swallow what you get Maybe the warzone is only in my head The bleeding bodies, wounds of slavery Counting the footsteps of freedom Protect desire with barbed wire To do something you’re good in The dirt strangled with water we fear Like salt in the eyes of hope The sun in our heart we sold Just to fall like the fucking rest The weapon turns to red forget to reject To say I’m not guilty I call it revenge I won’t think about it I passed the test The permission to kill your heart at last The rage of the desert the dust you breath The day you think hell arrived Staring through the eyes of the corpses While you make the snakes blind A line in the sand marks our way Meters and meters we walked For nothing but death and the honor of lies We antagonize I am blind don’t let me die I’m too weak to leave The light of heaven is in my eyes But my friends will follow me
4.
Cold war on a damaged soul Black demons day by day Waking up in a grave of emptiness As a part of minority Watching the light which provides inspiration Thinking of an angel who became a plague The walls are laughing buried with no way out Hell reveals an opened door The condition to be petrified is the basis for contentment An invitation to a cold winter a cell of purified feelings Was spoken out by the face of solitude Was executed by the crying heaven Thrown in a bloody sea To learn how to swim Watching the forest of helplessness Swapping life for the moment A chamber of lost tears Explodes in a few long seconds A growing rage wrapped my body It made the final step There’s still the echo in my head That made me moving forward The Sleep for hours with a bleeding wound To remain the fortitude Locked in a tainted cell Filled with lunatic thoughts Drown Drown A shape comes out of nowhere Filling out the blind corner The thirst of my instincts, revives that blind eye Pictures pursuing me They bother me everywhere They want to be deleted four walls and one fearless roof below that little castle The invisible eye is watching you Every move is recorded Dusty toys wanna play with your mind As you played with mine In the shadows outlines stand out It can’t be prevented Clouds still crawl on a rainy sky The horizon is falling deeper On a little island without a sun With a hole in the middle Significant traces on the wall They will stay forever The masters view is plugged in It won’t miss one thing No No The first layer’s dissolved The entrails are cold and raw No No I began to take of your protecting skin Skin my home my refuge is free of you It’s done the construction is made The plague left the building Nothing is twisted everything’s saved My master takes the proof Leaving my home with bloody tears Carried on dirty hands A worthy soul with an unsold heart Has been taken to hell
5.
Bloody Brainstorms going in and out Information on it’s way but still unbound Thinking and acting in two different ways A long process and a long chase spits in my face fucking enraged Two languages leave out the word To kill with it the dirty sword The order to follow to leave out the waste Facing a sick solution Crying and begging won’t help to survive I’ve got to find a way out Maybe some sleep could help me again I should try to find out One million suns showed up piece by piece The difference only got bigger Long years and a few cold days Was it enough to change your face A big cut is the only chance To end up in prison Fight for salvation is worthless now My source keeps parching Did you struggle Did you suffer Did your body made that offer I can’t see clear I got that point The embrace of separation Now I go a few nights back Can’t count the meters can’t see an end Breathing is worthless I can only shout The air runs away The godlike devil is watching my steps Further it goes slow moving arms All the thoughts that spent my time Went away to heaven Soul owning isolation, concentration on intentions My corpse my pride Can you surface again Someone calls me someone’s here I see something twined by pain Two bodies two lifeless heads With my traesure in his arms He’s laid to rest
6.
I struggle with fear Seconds are turning It keeps us isolated Drowning alive A lonely night made my decision Eternity is an illusion Reality as adjustment, From first to last Call it soul purification Crows and angels fighting the fog To obnubilate my head I refresh the fire I fought with it’s distance Such a long time But as the sun sets It survives Silent wordless and shy In a few days you changed your face I know the reason for years Now feelings will die Bodies nailed in feather’s flesh Through the window the storm laughs Red tears on my cradle Without scratching on my conscience
7.
Sit down and watch the murder The sense of independence A world of pain or is it a lie I can’t blame you for tyranny The bridge burns I can’t go on Why don’t you give an answer My ugly soul won’t save you now It’s just empty and lost If you can’t see The wings are spread out You won’t say The change made you doubt The door is closed Painted black again Endless redemption Awaits my guilt The virus of life awakes my blood It rushes down I can’t get enough The hope falls on a red floor Disturbed by the lifeless The dark night of ignorance Destroys every part of me Driven by madness consumed by torn If that is what you want The hand keeps away all my aims Crushes down on what I create,this is too late dark blooded hate Blisters and air are all that remains The growing gras of twisted thoughts judges beyond knows who I am I became the dust in your lungs Are you able to breath to receive my revenge The face of fear is a beautiful picture Looking straight at my face to erase all my rage New day’s enslaved Old tragedy Wild growing plants Design my ways of life Tossing the coin of violence To see the price of senselessness Is it the judge of brutality That made me doubt It’s not the dance of minded creatures Pulling me down to this black ground what is that sound could it be found It’s a special offer to me Why do I go, am I alone to see the ground What I see is an angel crying To resolve conflicts with thoughts that fall apart we are The thunder that calls out the dragon To enter defenders of life could I survive the arrival of time A monster spoke to me for years Why I can’t see the choice that I made A aim that controls all the light Bright shines the dawn To respawn what I created It takes more than a word The silence of loud words destroys all days where I build my goals If you can’t see The wings are spread out You won’t say The change made you doubt The door is closed Painted black again Endless redemption Awaits my guilt
8.
A proposal a decision running out of me I pretend to realize freedom I resolve to die Many ways but I won’t go alone cause I think it’s right The tools of grief I got in my hand life’s what I denied Disillusioned dimensions of torture wolfs cry in vain Smiling eyes hell no a flaming sky I see pictures that lie The drugs are around the room speaks to me A portrait of my bleeding eyes I’ll pick you up my plans are made Seeking for deliverance I arranged myself With the god that wants to take you away The facts I can’t spawn Are the reasons he gots on his hand But there’s something else I don’t think he gets you Painted faces looking down on me I remember your signs When they watched me on my little feet The picture became clearly The lights are turned off I can’t face the reality The words of silence you spoke to me Justify everything you gave But why is it like this I can’t find it out The choice kills my brain Left or right right or left or both No I can’t do it right My thoughts are empty the power is left I will go to sleep Let us be immortal Do you hear it Do you listen Maybe I can give a proposal I’m coming with you won’t let you go Take my hand for immortality

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released February 20, 2009

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September Murder Thale, Germany

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